Friday, December 12, 2008

You Can Come, Too

If you know me, you know that there's a good chance I'm tired. My usual range is somewhere between manic bouts of energy to a coma-like trance. Why? Blame it on my wiring. Blame it on my wee one. Blame it on a busy mind. I just don't sleep well. Never have, hopefully will.

For the past who knows how many nights I have awoken to anxious Christmas thoughts in my head. I told myself (and others for validation) that I would NOT have an anxiety induced Advent. It was going to be peaceful and joyful and reflective. Hmmm...that's been a challenge. It's not that I'm out fighting crowds and racking up the credit card. It's more that I'm behind in preparations and haven't had the opportunity to do all the things I wanted to do. And, and, and...I'm tired.

So what's a girl to do when her little guy wakes her up at 4:30 (especially when he has taken her spot and is peacefully sleeping in her warm cozy bed)?? Well today, in a blessed moment, I read my Living Faith devotions while waiting for the computer to come alive. And wouldn't you know that it was speaking just to me.

Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28
What a wonderful invitation! Jesus offers rest from our grueling burdens and arduous efforts. What surprises me is how easily I forget this generous invitation when I am overwhelmed with work or with troubles that inevitably arise. Instead of leaning on the heart of Christ, I give in to anxiety and worry. I work even harder and spend later hours in the office. I squirm and struggle, trying to get things to develop my way. Instead of turning to prayer and giving more attention to my divine resource, I lessen the time, believing it will help me "get more done". What a crazy response to Christ's wonderful invitation. Eventually, I wake up and remember, "Oh, yes, I can find rest. I can receive an easing of what consumes me." This will happen if I deliberately slow down, become still, and turn my heart toward the One who urges, "Come to me." Sr. Joyce Rupp, O.S.M.

Once again, I've been given hope. Here's to "waking up".

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